How to Improve Communication with Loved Ones Affected by Memory Loss

Memory problems affect the whole family, and they can be troubling for the loved ones of seniors in memory care. Fortunately, there are ways to rebuild your connection with your loved one. 

Memory care encourages cognitive skill-building and protects your loved one from further mental decline. Follow this guide to improve your communication with your loved one — no matter their memory capabilities. 

Speak Clearly at a Slow Pace

While you should avoid patronizing or treating your loved one like a child, speaking at a slower pace than normal is best. This will help them process your words without getting upset and frustrated. 

Make sure you speak clearly, pronouncing your words with care. Your loved one in memory care may have trouble understanding speech, so it’s best to be as thorough as possible. 

Additionally, speaking at a fast pace can lead to overstimulation for your loved one. They may not be able to process lots of sounds, inflections, and tones of voice at one time. 

Use Gentle Touch to Show Affection and Love

You might feel frustrated trying to find ways to display your love and affection for your loved one with memory problems. Touch is powerful and can break through the barriers of cognitive problems. 

A Note About Consent

Always make sure that your loved one consents to being touched, even if you’re a close family member. They may not want physical affection at every opportunity, and that’s okay. Pushing their boundaries will only make things harder for them. 

Avoid Surprise Touches

Remember not to sneak up on your loved one or surprise them in any way. Let them know that you’re approaching them and tell them exactly what you plan to do. For example, you can say, “Mom, I’m going to give you a hug now. I love you.” 

Avoid Arguing with Your Loved One

If you have a loved one in memory care, you shouldn’t debate over facts and logic. Instead, validate their feelings, even if their thoughts aren’t rational or fact-based. 

Arguments don’t help your loved one “see the truth” or get on your side. In fact, getting into heated conversations may push them farther away from you emotionally. They can’t process information the same way they used to, so it’s important to be empathetic and understanding. 

In order to enjoy your time together, focus on emotional connections. It’s okay to validate scary, frustrating, and illogical thoughts and feelings. 

For example, if your loved one is convinced that they didn’t do something that they really did, you can say, “That must feel frustrating. I’m here for you.” 

Support Your Loved One in Memory Care with Good Communication Techniques

Feeling confused and forgetful can be a frightening and lonely experience for seniors. Use these communication tips to build a closer bond with your loved one in memory care.

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